Did you know………

My to do list for today

  1. Be grateful, for everything big and small.
  2. Be kind and mindful, we don’t know what people are going through.
  3. Let go of what I can’t control or change.
  4. Listen to my intuition.
  5. Be productive.
  6. Stay calm and smile.
  7. Breathe.

Every day I am going to try to do this and add something to it every day:) it’s a lot better than a New years resolution.

I caught the catfish !!!!

Part  3  of  my blog  ”Let’s go Catfishing”

Well everyone,  as I have said when I started this blog I was going to do stuff that I usually wouldn’t even think to do. I had always wondered if these dating sites were all they are cracked up to be …..so I joined one  or two. For a month at first, but then I realised to do a good job on this subject that I should give it time. So I continued the subscription for a further 3 months. Remember, I said I would be the guinea pig for you !!

I am, a natural-born sceptic , so I tend not to believe everything I hear or read. But I decided I would be open and put my trust in this online site , because after all, that’s what everyone does in the hope of finding someone.

But, this is where things get ”iffy” for  me. Firstly when you fill out your profile , you want to come across as someone approachable and reasonably sane. And in return you hope the others are doing the same…….SO (and this is my experience) a guy looks at your profile, winks, puts you on his ”fav list”, sounds good!! But, the guys profile contradicts the photos or it says he’s from Ireland but speaks French/German/ but not English?? His profile says he has short dark hair but the photo is of a grey haired guy!! Not to be  put off, you think maybe a typo error so you reply.

Then after the first few hellos , how are you, I like your profile , comes the ”  are you on WhatsApp/hangout”.  I met one such guy and here is the story of what happened:

The guy was gorgeous, well at least the photos were of a gorgeous guy. Tall, educated and in my age bracket. Tick, tick and tick.

We started off on the site with a few mails about likes and dislikes and a bit of background info about each other. All seemed to be going well, I asked lots of questions as did he and I thought mmmm maybe I am too sceptical for my own good.

Then we exchanged email addresses and after that it got very intense very quickly. He asked if I was still on the site and when I answered ”yes” he got a little peeved , saying he would like if I deleted my profile because he had. I didn’t, and obviously he didn’t check , but I noticed his profile was gone. Within a couple of days I was waking up to romantic good morning songs via WhatsApp and a long message wishing me a good day and telling me how much I was missed!!!

Great if it’s coming from a genuine guy ….but the niggles were coming fast and furious and I was thinking this is too good to be true!! However, having chatted with my girls , they said to keep on, that there were some good guys out there and , after all I hadn’t given this guy a chance, and he could be a really good guy. Every morning and evening I got a message on Whatsapp and a long e-mail, telling me about his day and how much he missed me, how much he was in love with me and that he couldn’t wait to meet me. So on I went , but something was holding me back from being too open and I suppose I didn’t tell all the family secrets but either did he. I started to ask more questions about his life and family and it was like he had forgotten some things he had already said and I noticed some little cracks in what he was saying.

Now , here comes the funny stuff, he took a job as a ”consultant engineer” in Suawa( I think he meant Suva) but kept getting the time difference wrong and must have forgotten about Google and the info you can get about a place, because his description of the island was way different to what google said and showed!! STRIKE ONE.

Then he had to ”buy” pipes for the project because the company asked him to, but they were delayed coming from China……..which subsequently led to the delay in us meeting!!!! how convenient:) STRIKE TWO.

The island was invaded by ”sea pirates” and he was afraid they would get his valuables so he wanted to send them to me:) Unpolished diamonds!!!! Now, given that he had previously said there was nothing on the island it suddenly had a cargo office from where he could send these valuables. But the strangest part of it all was he thought I lived in Austria and said he would be starting a new job in Vienna as soon as the Suva project was finished. Who’s profile had he been mixing me up with hahhahaa.

When I said it wasn’t possible for me to take any kind of package like this I was instantly blocked on everything:) 🙂 !!! Heart broken definitely not, but I can understand how a vulnerable person could be sucked in by the romance of it all, but worse still who could find themselves in trouble by accepting a package from a relative stranger.

Not to be put off I continued, most of the guys from are Ireland……OMG. As an Irish woman I should have known what to expect but I am the ultimate optimist.

I got ”sorry” I can’t put a photo on my profile because:

  • I’m a teacher and my students might see it
  • Give me your number and I will send one to you privately
  • Haven’t got any photos of me on my own…and you might fancy my friend more
  • I’m married but just want a bit of fun
  • People locally know me and I don’t want anyone knowing I’m on this site
  • You might not like what you see.
  • If you’re a cougar in a short tight dress I will send you a photo

Jesus wept what’s a woman to do!!!! I’m good but I’m not physic. What happens to men, where are all the confident fellas gone?why go on a dating site if you don’t want to put a photo on your profile, or worse still why put me on your fav list and then don’t send a message??? Am I expecting too much? or am I expected to make the first move and be grateful to get on the fav list and send a message saying so? How can it be so difficult to meet , you have the anonymity of being online. Surely, breaking the ice should be easier online than if it was meeting face to face. Isn’t this supposed to be the easy way to connect with people before you meet and find out if you are suited. OR have I missed brief.

I will continue this seemingly  futile search and keep you posted.

Meanwhile if anyone has any suggestions ………

 

 

Forgiving Yourself

Stop replaying negative situations from your past over and over again in your mind.

Stop being a hostage to your past by reliving and over analysing your mistakes.

Don’t keep reminding yourself of the ‘could have’, ‘should have’ ‘would have’ events in your life.

RELEASE IT

LET IT GO

GET OVER IT

MOVE ON

 

Me, myself and God

The other day, I was travelling to the airport to pick up my son and my two grand daughters. I checked the flight time, the traffic and weather so that I could leave in plenty of time in case of unforeseen events.

I LIKE TO BE ON TIME. I hate being late for anything, and I hate when others are late for me.

20 minutes into the drive I saw the motorway warning that there had been a crash at the next junction and there was a delay of 10 minutes. Instantly I sent up a prayer for those involved, hoping that nobody was hurt or worse still dead. The traffic suddenly came to a stand still. This was the start of the delay. I wasn’t too bothered, I had left in plenty of time and this was ”the unforeseen event”. I glanced at the cars on each side of me and I got to thinking, ”how many of the drivers prayed for the people involved in the accident?? Did anyone else besides me do it?? Maybe their  prayer was for the traffic to move, or that they wouldn’t be late for work? but how many took the time to pray for someone else.

That got me adding another prayer to keep me safe on the remaining journey that was ahead of me, then I added for good measure that my kids, grandchildren, friends and anyone who knows me to be kept safe too. And so started my chat with the man above.

My friends will tell you I have epic chats with him at times, and this was just another chat.

Me: Good morning God, it’s me again. Sorry that I didn’t say good morning earlier(I usually say it as soon as I wake up). I know I am always asking for things from you, and today is the same. Keep the kids safe, help them today, you know where and how they need help, you know which one needs a light bulb moment so I won’t go through the list because you already know…..you’re God after all.

Keep the people in the accident safe too and if I’m the only one praying for them at least they have someone …right??If any of them died  take their souls to heaven. Help their families in the coming months with the hard time ahead .

Do you ever get exasperated God?? with your family, I mean mankind, we are your family, and I can’t imagine what you must think when you look down and see the carry on of us all. Don’t you ever despair at it all?? I know I do with my lot, and compared to you I shouldn’t complain at all. I wonder does anyone else think of you like this or am I the right side of a padded cell:) But someone should be mindful of your feelings, sometimes I think my lot forget I have feelings and I am just a means to an end. That’s why I’m always looking for your help, always asking questions, always looking to you for answers, some of which I should remind you that you haven’t answered yet. Ohh… sorry God, should I be talking to you like this, because you are God.

Hang on the traffic is moving…..hell just a few feet, the accident must be serious. How do you decide God, who lives , who dies, who survives something terrible and who doesn’t. Sometimes I wish I could talk to you face to face and ask all the questions that only you can answer…..but then I think…..no. I would be dead if that happened and I’m hoping I’m on  the end of any list you have regarding that. Do you have lists?? you know everything so I don’t suppose you do really, you don’t need one.

I look at the drivers on either side of me again, different people now, looking fed up, one is on the phone the other has his head cradled in his hand looking like he will fall asleep if the traffic doesn’t move soon. God, don’t let him fall asleep or I will never get to the airport on time.

The traffic moves slowly again, I can’t see anything only cars, the accident must be further up, that means I am way back , the clock is ticking, I still have time. What’s happening that the traffic is so slow, I hope it’s not a pile-up. I bet none of those people thought this would happen to them today.

On a different note God, I know I’m always asking you to put someone nice in my life, and I’m asking this a long time now , but can I ask that you make it sooner rather than later. Good things come to those who wait!!! but you don’t say how long the wait is!!!

I also know ”ask and you shall receive” and I know it’s always when the time is right, and all that , BUT and you already know this…you need to give me the heads up , coz I am really stupid when it comes to seeing signs.

Now I feel guilty for asking for something for myself, when someone could be dying on the road ahead. Is that why you don’t answer this particular prayer, I always ”slip” it into other prayers.

Well I put it out there again, and I will wait. Traffic moving a bit better now still no sign of what’s  causing the delay, slowly, slowly , but at least we are moving now.

Sorry for the bad language God, but I just hate when those smart asses fly up the inside lane to get ahead and then expect to be let into the lane where we have all been patiently waiting…it boils my blood. Why isn’t there a policeman at the end of that lane and hold them all till the rest of the traffic goes. That would teach them , but of course that would be the fair thing to do, and I let one of them go ahead of me. That’s my good deed for the  day ok!!!

The traffic starts to build up speed now and I can see the red and blue flashing lights ahead. The scene has all but been cleared away and there are hardly any signs that there was an accident at all. I look at the time and realise I have been chatting to you for an hour. Well thank you God for your company, it passed quickly and I enjoyed our chat. I have to fly now so I’m not late , but I’m sure there are loads waiting to chat and loads a lot worse off than me, so have a good day and I will have my usual chat with you at bedtime. By the way, don’t forget the nice man and a lotto win would be great too. Continue reading

Infectious smiling

hugging-smileys

Smiling is infectious,

You catch it like the flu.

When someone smiled at my today, I started smiling too.

I walked around the  corner and someone saw me grin.

When he smiled I realised, I’d passed it on to him.

I thought about the smile, then realised it’s worth.

A single  smile like mine could travel round the earth.

So if you feel a smile begin, don’t leave it undetected.

Start an epidemic and get the World infected.

                                                               Spike Milligan

You’re smiling now…aren’t you!!!!

 

Getting back in the saddle!!!

Almost a year ago I decided to come back home, quit my job as Hotel Manager and be nearer my family. It wasn’t a decision I made easily. I had become accustomed to warmer climate,a foreign language, working 12+ hours everyday with one free day. But, I loved it….I revelled in the excitement of new guests, every day being different, non stop holiday music, smiling faces and a pace that kept everyone’s weight low….but I loved it.

The comradery, the pressure, the constant checking and controlling staff, food, chefs and everything in between while running a great hotel  was my life , so you can imagine the abrupt stop I came to when I came home.

It’s ok I told myself, you’ll get used to it, it is what you want after all. I got busy getting to know everyone even better than I had, places that had changed or had completely gone, familiarising myself with a social system I had long forgotten. It took a lot less time then I had imagined. So next on the list (one of the many ”to do” lists I had), find somewhere to live….easy…..no, it turned out to be  a nightmare. The housing system or lack of it leaves a lot to be desired, and one office doesn’t know what the others are doing, so there is a constant miscommunication. Files being misplaced, application forms being lost, or so they said, never the same person dealing with the issue , so there is an irritating repetition of what you are looking for and your general information. Having got through it all, there is a waiting list to actually go on a waiting list!!! I’m beginning  to ask myself if this really is a good idea.

Anyway to cut a very long story short, I am now in my new home albeit a rented one, but it’s mine and I’m starting to settle down. Thoughts of what next keep creeping into my mind. I decided to start this blog by giving myself 1 year to decide what to do, hence the name of the blog:)

I travelled some and write about things important to me in the hopes to distress and maybe it would be a good read for some people.

The 365 days are almost up, it went faster than I thought it would and I’m not sure I achieved what I set out to, but I do know that I NEED TO WORK, not for financial reasons, although the money side is important. I have realised in this time that I am a people person, I am a workaholic, my brain needs stimulation, I like organising people and things, I love being a boss and I love to see staff exceed their own expectations, as well as the guests. I love watching people improve and get excited about their day, reaching for promotions and targets. Yes, I am a workaholic. But, you have to be passionate about it.

I want to share with people, my knowledge, my skills, and hopefully my work ethics, because for me I lead by example. They say if you’re away from the tourism business too long you miss out, so it’s time to get back in the saddle, but here’s where the dilemma lies, to do what I love and do it well only the same as before just in my home country or change careers and do something completely different and have more time on my hands. It’s one of those things that you wish someone would decide for you but you know nobody can, and even if someone could would I agree with their decision 🙂

A recent article I read said from ages 0-18 is the easy time in your life, from 20 – 65 we work and from 65 on is a bonus. So why not do what you love to do in your working years. I don’t just want to work for the sake of working, doing something I don’t particularly like  or from pay cheque to pay cheque.

Getting back in the saddle isn’t as easy as it’s made out to be, do you get back in your old familiar saddle or do you go for the new one even if it’s on a smaller horse:))

thoughts and advice would be gratefully accepted.

Chat soon x