Part 3 of my blog ”Let’s go Catfishing”
Well everyone, as I have said when I started this blog I was going to do stuff that I usually wouldn’t even think to do. I had always wondered if these dating sites were all they are cracked up to be …..so I joined one or two. For a month at first, but then I realised to do a good job on this subject that I should give it time. So I continued the subscription for a further 3 months. Remember, I said I would be the guinea pig for you !!
I am, a natural-born sceptic , so I tend not to believe everything I hear or read. But I decided I would be open and put my trust in this online site , because after all, that’s what everyone does in the hope of finding someone.
But, this is where things get ”iffy” for me. Firstly when you fill out your profile , you want to come across as someone approachable and reasonably sane. And in return you hope the others are doing the same…….SO (and this is my experience) a guy looks at your profile, winks, puts you on his ”fav list”, sounds good!! But, the guys profile contradicts the photos or it says he’s from Ireland but speaks French/German/ but not English?? His profile says he has short dark hair but the photo is of a grey haired guy!! Not to be put off, you think maybe a typo error so you reply.
Then after the first few hellos , how are you, I like your profile , comes the ” are you on WhatsApp/hangout”. I met one such guy and here is the story of what happened:
The guy was gorgeous, well at least the photos were of a gorgeous guy. Tall, educated and in my age bracket. Tick, tick and tick.
We started off on the site with a few mails about likes and dislikes and a bit of background info about each other. All seemed to be going well, I asked lots of questions as did he and I thought mmmm maybe I am too sceptical for my own good.
Then we exchanged email addresses and after that it got very intense very quickly. He asked if I was still on the site and when I answered ”yes” he got a little peeved , saying he would like if I deleted my profile because he had. I didn’t, and obviously he didn’t check , but I noticed his profile was gone. Within a couple of days I was waking up to romantic good morning songs via WhatsApp and a long message wishing me a good day and telling me how much I was missed!!!
Great if it’s coming from a genuine guy ….but the niggles were coming fast and furious and I was thinking this is too good to be true!! However, having chatted with my girls , they said to keep on, that there were some good guys out there and , after all I hadn’t given this guy a chance, and he could be a really good guy. Every morning and evening I got a message on Whatsapp and a long e-mail, telling me about his day and how much he missed me, how much he was in love with me and that he couldn’t wait to meet me. So on I went , but something was holding me back from being too open and I suppose I didn’t tell all the family secrets but either did he. I started to ask more questions about his life and family and it was like he had forgotten some things he had already said and I noticed some little cracks in what he was saying.
Now , here comes the funny stuff, he took a job as a ”consultant engineer” in Suawa( I think he meant Suva) but kept getting the time difference wrong and must have forgotten about Google and the info you can get about a place, because his description of the island was way different to what google said and showed!! STRIKE ONE.
Then he had to ”buy” pipes for the project because the company asked him to, but they were delayed coming from China……..which subsequently led to the delay in us meeting!!!! how convenient:) STRIKE TWO.
The island was invaded by ”sea pirates” and he was afraid they would get his valuables so he wanted to send them to me:) Unpolished diamonds!!!! Now, given that he had previously said there was nothing on the island it suddenly had a cargo office from where he could send these valuables. But the strangest part of it all was he thought I lived in Austria and said he would be starting a new job in Vienna as soon as the Suva project was finished. Who’s profile had he been mixing me up with hahhahaa.
When I said it wasn’t possible for me to take any kind of package like this I was instantly blocked on everything:) 🙂 !!! Heart broken definitely not, but I can understand how a vulnerable person could be sucked in by the romance of it all, but worse still who could find themselves in trouble by accepting a package from a relative stranger.
Not to be put off I continued, most of the guys from are Ireland……OMG. As an Irish woman I should have known what to expect but I am the ultimate optimist.
I got ”sorry” I can’t put a photo on my profile because:
- I’m a teacher and my students might see it
- Give me your number and I will send one to you privately
- Haven’t got any photos of me on my own…and you might fancy my friend more
- I’m married but just want a bit of fun
- People locally know me and I don’t want anyone knowing I’m on this site
- You might not like what you see.
- If you’re a cougar in a short tight dress I will send you a photo
Jesus wept what’s a woman to do!!!! I’m good but I’m not physic. What happens to men, where are all the confident fellas gone?why go on a dating site if you don’t want to put a photo on your profile, or worse still why put me on your fav list and then don’t send a message??? Am I expecting too much? or am I expected to make the first move and be grateful to get on the fav list and send a message saying so? How can it be so difficult to meet , you have the anonymity of being online. Surely, breaking the ice should be easier online than if it was meeting face to face. Isn’t this supposed to be the easy way to connect with people before you meet and find out if you are suited. OR have I missed brief.
I will continue this seemingly futile search and keep you posted.
Meanwhile if anyone has any suggestions ………